It wasn’t until I was a 27-year old that I fell in love with being a woman. It was then that I saw strength in our femininity, beauty in our vulnerability and the future in our voices. I was surrounded by women that were beautiful, smart, driven, creative, funny, witty etc. and they were inspiring. I spent most of my twenties tapping into a masculine side that wasn’t very authentic to who I was. I thought “masculine” equaled strength. I didn’t understand how strong women were. But when I stopped and looked at the women I was surrounded by or “my TRIBE” and realized how much I adored them, I started looking at myself a little different. I was one of them. I was soft like them. I was strong like them. I was vulnerable like them. I was dynamic like them. “I should be proud to be a woman” is how I felt that day and that’s how I felt on January 21st.
“I ran around in circles, think I made myself dizzy.”
Brooklyn, New York. Amsterdam, The Netherlands. Atlanta, Georgia. In the last year, I have lived in three different places. Never feeling stable or secure in my location, I was constantly thinking (read: dreaming) about the next place I wanted to attempt to live in and plant roots. Even after coming back from my Eurotrip, I was plotting on moving to the West Coast after only 15 days of planning. Now my inner therapist would tell me to think about why I have been bouncing around from place to place and why I wasn’t feeling fulfilled when I did. Why was I running around in a circle like a chicken with its head cut off? In my professional counselor voice, “What underlying issues am I avoiding?”
At the top of the year, I read Shonda Rhimes’ Year of Yes book for the first book of the year with my book club. To sum up the book, Shonda decided to spend a year saying yes to everything that scared her. From going to sit with Oprah to giving a commencement speech at her alma mater, Dartmouth College. A week after I finished the book, I received a free entry into the 2016 NY Marathon. At first, I said “absolutely not” but I didn’t delete the email. After two days of feeling guilty for reading that motivating and inspiring book, I registered for the marathon while waiting to board a plane to Berlin during my euro trip.